Saturday, January 02, 2016

94) Why most New Year Resolutions fail

First of all Wish all those who are reading this blog a Very Happy , Prosperous and Healthy New Year 2016 .
Before every New Year starts most of the people make grand New Year Resolutions with respect to improving their health , finances , career ,relationships etc etc and no doubt they will start working on these resolutions firmly for the first couple of weeks and then slowly the intensity will come down and die down in due course only to restart the whole process the next New Year and this cycle continues . Only very few are quite successful in maintaining their New Year Resolutions . 
Now the question comes : Why are New Year Resolutions not really effective for most people ?

The answer is simple : either people make Wrong New Year Resolutions and even if they make the right ones they set un-realistically high goals , much beyond their potential and slowly the realise the fact that they are no way near to the goals they have set and end up frustrated  . 

Only people with clarity make the right resolutions and keep also their goals realistic . Also clear people do not make one sudden resolution for the new year , they have been working on those goals before also and use New Year as a refernce point to evaluate those goals .

What constitutes Clarity ? People with well defined Value structure are very clear  and most people who are confused are those who do not have a clear value structure or have conflicting value structure . For eg I know of people who talk lot of spiritual topics , read spiritual books etc and always complain that they do not have time for their spiritual practice or to attend spiritual retreats etc but if you onserve them closely they are not as spiritual as they claim to be and they have deep attachment towards money , owning big property , cars etc etc . Nothing wrong in earning money , having a nice house or a flasy car but to achieve these things one must put in lot of time and energy and hence such people lack time and energy for their spiritual pursuits .But these people will not see their own inner contradictions and will keep blaming others for their lack of time for their spiritual pursuits . This is what is called as lacking clarity in one's value structure and if such people make high new year resolutions with regard to their spiritual practices then they will definitely fail .

So what is the solution ? They have to first be clear with their own value structure and be honest in accepting and acknowledging them . Nothing wrong in accepting the fact that one likes to make more money or have a bigger house , better car etc .  We have to make our own list with regard to our own value structure and the more clear we are with regard to our own value structure then the more clear and realistic we will be with regard to setting the appropriate goals  and also executing the same .

Now next question comes as to how to develop one's own value structure with clarity ?  The answer is only with daily honest introspection about ourself , our family , our outer goals , our inner goals , our lifestyle etc etc we can start developing our value structure and prioritising them accordingly .  This is not an easy task and each individual must learn to be honest with himself in discovering his / her real values and slowly keep working on them . Once you start  getting clarity with regard to your own value structure then you will become quite realistic in setting your goals accordingly .

So next time you get frustrated in finding not being able to maintain your New Year Resolutions then  instead of cursing yourself or others for the same better sit down and reflect on your value structure and rework your goals accordingly .

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